Itzoe.net

Shooting Greedo first since 1996.


Sons, fathers and religion, part 2

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

I've been kind of dreading coming back to the blog. I don't know what to say anymore, and the longer I'm away, the harder it is to come back. As much as I love doing this, I'd barely gotten started, and suddenly, it's like the thrill is gone.

For those who don't know, our father passed away on the fifth of this month. He'd been on chemo since February, but had always maintained a positive outlook and his quick wit. That's why this was such a shock. None of us was expecting this.

I look back at my post from October 26 with some degree of sadness and revulsion. Part of me wants to take it off, but I won't. What's past is past, I suppose, and it would be a disservice to this site as a concept if I felt the need to start censoring myself just because a previous post makes me uncomfortable. In fact, even in hindsight, it's still a funny story in its way, and I'm glad I had the opportunity to share it with Dad. He found humor in everything.

Geez, I really didn't start this to eulogize or feel sad. Mostly I'm here because I felt the site was becoming neglected and I was starting to have a hard time watching it get stale. And I'm here to say the site is still active and, at some point, life must go on. I understand in the grand scheme of things, a vanity web site isn't much, but if nothing else it's certainly cathartic.

So for the time being, while the void remains, I doubt there'll be as much activity as I used to imagine. I know for the last couple weeks I've just not had the desire to say anything, and I guess there'll be many days like that to come. Still, stick around, and slowly things will get better.